Monday, 30 September 2013

Lumps or no Lumps, that is the Question …..

Some things are just NOT supposed to have lumps:-

                    Custard        Gravy        Cheese Sauce      and


Back in July, as we were passing through Preston Brook, the Skipper bought new ropes from a certain well-known chandlers.  Two months later and the Skipper is not a happy bunny because he has noticed that lumps/swellings are growing on said ropes.  So, as we passed through Braunston, the worst rope – the front one – was taken in to be exchanged.

It went something like this:-

John:  I bought these ropes two months ago and they’re growing lumps.

Shop Assistant:  Well, I’ve heard it all now.  Ropes growing lumps?

John:  Well you tell me what’s happening to them then.  These lumps weren’t there when I bought them.

Shop Assistant:  Ropes can’t grow lumps!  They’re polypropylene!  Plastic!

John:  Well I’m not happy with them  – I would like this one at least to be exchanged please.

Shop Assistant:  It’s a rope!  There’s nothing wrong with it.  It just got wet that’s all.

John:  It’s been on a boat!  Ropes on boats DO get wet!  That doesn’t mean they’re allowed to get lumpy.   I don’t want lumpy ropes.  It’s clearly a faulty batch and the manufacturers need to be informed.

Manager:   (Who had obviously been lurking in the shadows listening)  Do you speak Taiwanese? 

John:  Obviously not but one of your reps ought to be able to.

Manager:  Oh, just cut him a new length – we can sell this one.

John:  At a reduced price I hope.

Manager:  (SMIRK) 

Shop Assistant:  (returning with a new length of rope)  Are you happy with that, Sir?

John:  Yes thank you. I’ll be back with the others if they get any worse, that is, if they get any more lumps!!  Goodbye.


Now I have to ask, is this really how a major retail outlet should conduct business/treat its customers?  Whatever, BOATERS BEWARE!  If you go in to buy a 10m length of rope and you are offered a ready whipped and spliced one, CHECK IT FOR LUMPS!!!!!!

broken leg 037


  1. Jill, Matilda Rose30 September 2013 at 11:02

    How has Lola's op gone?

    1. Op went well, she's all pinned & bandaged, which is a lovely shade of lime green,......... darling. She's still a bit sedated, I fear the fun will start tomorrow, cage rest!!!!!!! That IS going to be a challenge, necessary, but 12 weeks????? We'll see how we get on.

  2. Ooooooo ropes whipped! Whatever next?

    1. Behave, this site is open to everybody, they'll all want to join in.

  3. Your Skipper is correct - ropes that develop lumps means that the fibers are not laying correctly in the rope and are bunching up in a way that will cause the rope to lose strength. In climbing ropes, it can happen if a rope is suddenly stressed over an edge. I'd figure that a rope used on a boat could have stresses like that, and perhaps develop lumps, but it's not good, especially in a 2 month old line!

    OK, getting caught up again!